Numb

I wish this pain would go away
   want               to
I've thought about the insulin. just where. I have a couple of solid places in mind. But at the same time I want to be found.
I have such a headache because I ate to much junk.  I want to throw it up. But i'm not very good at it plus the family is home. one day I will succeed.
I think it's unfair for me to ask for help when i'm not sick, i'm not poor, i'm not dependent on others but yet I am? I confuse myself 24/7
I think i'm being an attention whore 24/7
I think I crave attention 24/7
I pushed everybody away by being a bitch.
My friends confuse me, they don't really like me.
My "gf" or w.e I don't even know it's like it's a repeat from before.
Everything is a repeat, it's all the same.
I'm always sad and i feel that I do it for attention but I don't.
I laugh at everything but is it really actually funny?
I'm thin but am I actually thin or am I just fat like I always think I am.
My legs are huge.
I'm to fat to be a model, too akward, to weird, to ugly, to unstable.
I'm in a fucking wonderful mood.
I want to take the needle to my arm and push the plunger.